Emotional Cheating- The fine line between Friendship vs. Emotional AffairEye Spy Blog 1
How DO you know the difference?
Eye Spy discusses emotional cheating. The line between a friendship and something more is razor thin. And maybe the only difference is ONE thought, ONE glance, ONE I-Wonder daydream.
You can live for a long time in a dangerous friendship without ever calling it an emotional affair.
This is how it starts: You/they talk a LOT. Go to lunch or the gym together when your husband/Wife was not around, and tell him that you were hanging out. It stats with being close friends. Then you start emailing, IM’ing, texting and spending time on the phone talking about your own relationship and the problems you are having with your marriage.
And then there is your heart, your secret.
You don’t want to admit to yourself that you desired him/her, wanting them and feeling conflicted about your own marriage. You don’t want to admit that you would look for him/her in a crowd, that you dressed so that they would think you were pretty/handsome. You don’t want to admit that you think about them all. the. time.
And all of this before anything physical began.
Not every emotional affair morphs into a physical one. But many do. A physical affair begins in the heart before it ever moves to the bedroom.
There are hot co-workers, younger-than-you guys at church, really good looking dads at the elementary school, your Wife’s friends. There might be the barista who remembers your name and smiles at you or the hottie from high school who finds you on Facebook. Maybe it’s a professional relationship, thoroughly justified in it’s function, or a partnership in a ministry. Maybe its simply the husband/Wife of your best friend.
So how do you determine if your friendship is actually an emotional affair?
1. You find yourself thinking about him.
2. Their attention makes you feel good.
3. You compare him/her to your husband/Wife.
4. You look for ways to be with him/her or reasons to talk to him/her, even in groups.
5. You would be embarrassed if your husband/Wife heard your conversations.
6. You would be embarrassed if your husband/Wife knew your thoughts.
I believe many women/men are living with dangerous friendships disguised, even to themselves, as emotional affairs.
An emotional affair can also be one sided. It doesn’t need to be a mutual attraction.
Did that get your attention?
Even if he’s never said anything suggestive to her, even if he’s never outwardly flirted with her, even if he’s never told his wife he thinks about someone else..he is thinking. What matters is the condition of your own heart.
What about you? Have you ever had an emotional affair? Do you wonder if a friendship you have NOW is an emotional affair?
Call Eye Spy to find out what is going on 888-393-799